Coma
by icywarm
Summary: This is it. Shizuo actually got me. I can see the white and, I'm in Shinra's office? Shizuo is here, apologizing to me. Shinra says I've been in a coma for about a month. They keep calling me Psyche and apparently, everything I remember was the made up
1. Chapter 1

**I decided that I would type this up, even if no one is interested. *I am assuming things because no one has reviewed yet.* Anyway, this idea literally assaulted me while I was trying to clean and think of what to do next for Nai Wata Shi. **

**It's going to be a bit weird writing, since Psyche is Izaya but Izaya thinks that he's just Izaya.**

**Summery: This is it. Shizuo actually got me. I can see the white and, I'm in Shinra's office? Shizuo is here, apologizing to me. Shinra says I've been in a coma for about a month. They keep calling me Psyche and apparently, everything I remember was the made up dream I dreamt while in my coma. What the Hell is going on here?**

**Disclaimer: I do not in anyway own these characters. The only thing I own is the idea and the way I type it up. [I hope that I own that, but I don't remember seeing anything like this before.**

**Warning(s): Well, it's obviously Tsugaru X Psyche (Izaya).**

**Info: (Izaya) Psyche's full name will be Psyche Orihara and Tsugaru's full name will be Tsugaru Heiwajima. I'm too lazy to try and come up with different last names and it fits. And I've decided that Celty isn't actually a Dullahan. She's a person. But she dresses the same and [obviously] has her head. She does ride around on a motorcycle as well.**

"You missed again, Shizu-chan! What are you, blind? Or perhaps you actually care for me! Maybe you just got tired of chasing me, for once, and aimed at all these lovely bystanders." I giggled to myself as I could see the veins pulsate against Shizu-chan's head. It was just so fun to piss him off.

"You know, I-za-ya-kun, its incredible rude to assume things about people." I dropped my grin. That sentence was uttered a little, who am I kidding? It was uttered way too calmly to be Shizuo. He walked towards me, seemingly completely calm. I knew I should run, but the way he was being so cam froze me. For once in my life, I was completely, and utterly afraid.

"I want you to die, flea." I couldn't move. Shizuo forced my flickblade out of my hand and, I let him. I couldn't move; I couldn't say a word. Shizuo held my own blade to my throat. "Do you have any last words?" I didn't. My mind was blank, except for one thought.

'This is it. Shizu-chan is actually going to kill me. I-I'm going to die.'

The utter fear showed on my face, however, Shizu-chan was completely unaffected. I held my breathe and closed my eyes tight and I felt the cool metal of my blade slice my own throat. I didn't feel a thing and my life didn't flash in front of my eyes.

Instead, I could feel a bed underneath me. I was in too much pain to open my eyes. However, it wasn't my neck that hurt, it was my chest. Slowly, I started to hear all the noises around me. I also heard two very distinct voices talking. Shinra and Shizuo.

"Tsugaru, its 2:30 in the morning. Leave him be and come rest."

"Shinra, I want to be here when he wakes up. I want to apologize and tell him how sorry I am the moment he wakes up."

"You won't be able to if you exhaust yourself to the point of collapsing. Besides, you need as much rest as you can get if you want your arm to finish healing. It'll be in that cast for about another two weeks."

There was a slight pause. "I know. But I feel so bad. I've never lost my temper before. I never knew I had such strength. And, I used it against Psyche."

'Shizu-chan thinks he's never lost his temper before and didn't know of his strength. Shinra keeps calling Shizu-chan Tsugaru, and Shizu-chan just refereed to me as Psyche. What. The. Hell. Is. Going. On. Here?' I was seriously confused by the conversation. I didn't know what was going on, and I always know what's going on. I'm Orihara Izaya!

"Ah! Tsugaru! Look at the machines! He's aware and awake!"

"Really?" I could hear… excitement and relief in his voice. What the Hell? I soon felt Shizu-chan beside me, holding my hand. And not in a threatening way. I was still in too much pain to actually open my eyes and I honestly didn't want to deal with anything.

"Psyche-chan, I'm so sorry! I just snapped when you accessed me of liking Celty more than I like you. As soon as I hit you, I got so scared. I thought I didn't have the strength to send anyone flying like that. If it makes you feel any better, the strain broke my arm. You've been asleep for around a month."

"Tsugaru, give poor Psyche some space. Just wait in the other room while I talk to him."

There was a moment's hesitation before I could hear Shizu-chan agree and leave. After I was sure that Shizu-chan really was gone, I slowly and painfully sat up.

"Ah, Psyche, let me help!" Shinra exclaimed before he helped me up. "You've been in a coma for about a month. How do you feel?"

I was confused. Didn't Shizu-chan kill me? And if he didn't kill me, why was he so worried that I was in said coma? And why the Hell did they did keep calling me Psyche? My name is Izaya, damn it! "Shinra, who is Psyche?"

Shinra seemed generally surprised by my question, which only confused me more. "You're Psyche. Orihara Psyche."

"No," I argued, knowing that I was right. "I'm Izaya. Orihara Izaya. And I'm confused, why did Shizu-chan sound so worried about me?" Actually admitting that I was confused was a large hit to my ego, but whatever.

Shinra's eyes widened, as if he didn't believe what I was saying. But, why? He knows that Shizu-chan and I are on bad terms.

"You mean Tsugaru? Psyche, you couldn't have forgotten him. You two are closer than me and Celty."

"WHAT? That can't be true! Shizu-chan and I hate each other's guts. We have from the moment you introduced us to each other." This can't be true. Shinra and Shizu-chan have to be playing some weird prank on me. Yeah, that had to be it. Shizu-chan decided that he wanted to piss me off for once, so he threatened Shinra to play along. That makes complete sense.

"Psyche, I didn't introduce you to Tsugaru. You've never hated each other in any way. Something must have happened to your brain when Tsugaru punched you. Tell me everything you remember right now."

There was a commanding tone to his voice. Seriousness I've never heard Shinra speak with. Something told me that I would be in deep shit if I disobeyed him. So, I told him. I told him everything I remembered, including my death right before I 'woke' up.

At the end of my, well, life story, Shinra had some sort of look on his face. I didn't really know how to describe it. All I knew was that it meant bad new.

"Psyche," There he goes with the Psyche again. "I believe I have an explanation."

"Then tell me! I fucking hate not knowing!" Shinra flinched when I screamed that. Apparently, that's not how I talk. After my outburst, we both heard two voices from the other room.

"Tsugaru! Calm down! I'm sure Psyche is fine! Just let Shinra talk to him."

"Celty, that's not how Psyche talks at all! I'm worried."

"I don't think barging in there is the smartest thing to do. The last thing Psyche probably remembers is you sending him flying with a punch!" There was silence after that.

Shinra quickly excused himself momentarily to tell them not to worry. Soon, he was back.

"As I was saying, I think I may have an explanation." He cleared his throat. "The last thing that happened to you before you went into your coma was Tsugaru punching you. It would have terribly frightened you. Especially since you and Tsugaru are lover."

I was too stunned to say anything. Seeing as I was silent, Shinra continued. "You were, for once, scared at how weak and innocent you are, err, were. You didn't know how to think of Tsugaru. So, your mind created a place for you to live and grow 'stronger'. I'm going to tell you this right now. None of that is real. There are no such things as Dullahans; you are an only child, as is Tsugaru. What most likely happened is that in this 'dream world' of yours, you constructed a stronger personality. And when you met Tsugaru, or Shizu-chan, you wanted to be with him, but were subconsciously scared of him, so you decided that you hated him. Your strongest memory of Tsugaru was when he lost his temper and punched you with incredible strength. So, you made your version of Tsugaru with inhuman strength and an incredibly short temper. When it got to the point of your 'death' you froze because your Shizu-chan was acting like Tsugaru. And it was if your lover was killing you. Then, you woke up. Your subconscious has been repressed for a month, however, to you, it seemed like 23 years. It's the same as having a split personality."

I just sat there, absorbing it all. There's no way the whole thing could have been made up, could there? But, damn it! Shinra's explanation did make some sense. And I couldn't think of anything better. "So, what do I do now?" It was a stupid question, but I was at a loss for what to do.

"Personally, I would go home with Tsugaru. You two do live together. And seeing things you're familiar with should help bring your memory back. I'm just going to explain what happened to Tsugaru and Celty now."

He left the room and there was a moment of silence before. "What do you mean I live with Shizu-chan?"

**Well, I think that I did well. Does this make sense? Basically, Izaya's whole life was really just a dream he made up while in a coma. He is really Psyche Orihara, boy-friend to Tsugaru Heiwajima. However, upon waking from his month long coma, he does not remember his life as Psyche. Only his 'fake' life as Izaya.**

**Please review telling me what you think. I would really appreciate it. And remember, if any of you read Truly a Monster, and liked it, just tell me and I'll put it back up.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Now, I'm typing up chapter two of Coma. And, I kind of have a half idea of what I want to do with this chapter. But that's alright. I'm on a writing stroll right now. I just finished typing up chapter six of Nai Wata Shi and I'm feeling great. Especially since I'm listening to music that I like while I type.**

**Summery and Disclaimer are in chapter one.**

**Info: Basically, Izaya's whole life was something fake he experienced while in a month long coma. He is really Psyche Orihara, boyfriend to Tsugaru Heiwajima. However, upon waking up, he doesn't remember his life as Psyche. Shinra thinks that it's the same as having a split personality.**

**Warning(s): **

"So, Psyche doesn't remember anything." You could hear the sadness in my voice. "And not only does he not remember me, but he's convinced that he hates me." I didn't want to believe it, but, Shinra was my friend. He's never lied to me before. It did make sense as well.

"Come on, Tsugaru, don't be so sad!" Celty tried to cheer me up. "It's not like he'll never remember you. All it'll take is a matter of time. You and Psyche love each other, even more so than me and Shinra. He can't just hate you, it doesn't work."

"Celty's right, Tsugaru. Take him home, show him stuff, pictures you may have. Gradually, his memory should return. He may not be exactly the same when it does, but he'll love you. He always has, and always will. Psyche just doesn't know it yet. Come on, I think you should talk to him now. Make him feel better. He seems to be in denial because of what he experience when he was in his coma."

I hesitated for a moment before nodding and making my way to the room Psyche was staying in.

…/…LB [3rd person omniscient]

"What do you want?" Psyche spit out with venom, not wanting to deal with Shizuo or Tsugaru or whoever he was.

"I came to talk with you, Psyche." Tsugaru said that sentence with so much kindness. It scared Psyche a bit.

"My names not Psyche, it's Izaya. Get it right, Shizu-chan." Tsugaru sat down next to Psyche and wrapped his arms around his torso. "W-what the Hell are you doing?" Psyche still, somewhat, believed that this was some sort of joke that Shizuo and Shinra were pulling on him.

"I'm hugging you, Psyche-chan. It always made you feel better before. And my name isn't Shizu-chan. It's Tsugaru. You always call me Tsu-chan." Psyche mentally gagged a bit at the name.

"I don't care who you are! Just let me go!" Tsugaru instantly let go of Psyche, hurt evident on his face.

"Y-you really don't remember a thing, do you?" Tsugaru's voice was laced with sadness. To Psyche, it seemed as if he were going to cry. That disturbed him. Shizuo Heiwajima did not cry, no matter what the circumstances. "It's fine." Tsugaru stood up, and headed towards the door.

"Where are you going, Shizu-chan?" Psyche asked, generally curious.

"I'm going home Psyche. It's obvious that you don't want me around. If you want to see me, just have Celty take you. You'll be welcome; it is your home as well." Psyche felt something, most likely sadness, at seeing the blond, kimono-wearing man leave, but he said nothing. He hates Shizu-chan. A thought entered his head. 'According to everyone, this isn't Shizu-chan, its Tsugaru.'

…/…LB [Celty's POV]

Tsugaru looked so sad as he left. "Are you sure you don't want me to bring you home, it's nearly three in the morning." Tsugaru just sadly smiled at me.

"It's fine. I need to walk. And by the time I get home, I'll be pretty worn out."

"Alright. Remember, if you get into trouble, just call." Tsugaru nodded as he left.

"Celty, don't be too hard on him, he just woke up from a coma."

"Don't worry, Shinra, I'm not going to attack him, physically." Shinra said nothing as I entered Psyche's room.

Psyche looked generally surprised to see me. Well, from what I've heard from Shinra, he thinks I'm some creature called a Dullahan, who apparently doesn't have a head. "Psyche, you really hurt Tsugaru. I know you don't remember him, but you didn't have to be so rude! You know, it's three in the morning, and he's walking all the way home. Tsugaru will not fight no matter what, and so, if anything happens where he'd need to fight to protect himself, he wouldn't!"

I could see Psyche look down at the bed sheets. "Shizu-chan wouldn't let anyone attempt to attack him. He'd beat them down, like he always does."

I couldn't stand this. Psyche just, Psyche just doesn't seem to get it. "Psyche, I don't really care what you think reality is like. The thing is what you think it is, is not what really happened! The first time Tsugaru ever attacked anyone is when you accused him of secretly going out with me! And afterwards, he immediately felt horrible and carried you here by himself, despite the fact that he could have called me to help, and that he had a broken arm! He's even collapsed several times trying to avoid sleep so that he would be awake when you woke up! He cares for you! And all you're doing is making him feel horrible! Snap out of it, Psyche! You are Psyche Orihara, and you are Tsugaru Heiwajima's boyfriend."

I quickly righted myself over that little out burst, but Psyche had to see that what he thinks and what is are two different things. "The least you can do is be nice to Tsugaru and _try_ to remember." With that, I strode out of the room, leaving behind a confused Psyche, who actually somewhat regretted how he had acted towards Tsugaru.

**Well, do you guys feel bad for Tsugaru and Psyche? Yeah, I know that this is a short chapter, but I can't really think right now. And I'm supposed to be playing World of Warcraft so I can do the Hollow's end [Halloween] quests. It's awesome because I got a pet creepy crate.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Well, who else feels bad for Tsugaru? He's so hurt. And Psyche isn't making it better by calling him Shizu-chan and telling him to leave. I feel like a horrible person for writing that. But don't worry, Tsugaru, Psyche will go home and try to remember, as Celty had suggested.**

**Summery and disclaimer are in chapter one.**

**Info: Basically, Psyche goes home to Tsugaru, and does try to remember as Tsugaru tells him about, well, himself. And I've seen a lot of fanfics where Izaya loves ootoro, so I'm making that his/Psyche's favorite food. [And I really hope I'm spelling that right.]**

**Warning(s): **

I just sat there after Celty left. Surely, this Tsugaru guy would be alright, right? But if what Celty said was true, he wouldn't attack anyone. I rubbed my chest; it did feel as though it had been punched, even though Shizu-chan hadn't been able to hit me for awhile. I had hurt his feelings. I could clearly picture his hurt face and saddened tone as he left. And, it just didn't sit right with me. The thought of Tsugaru being sad because of me, well, to be honest, it hurt. Like a knife to my heart.

Both Celty and Shinra did say that we loved each other more than they love each other.

I sighed as I painfully got up and walked to a mirror, seeing myself for the first time.

I had the same face, and hair. The clothes I wore were white and pink. The coat I had on was white, with white fluff around the hood and at the end of the sleeves. It had six pink buttons. My pants were white as well, and my shoes were pink. Upon looking, I saw that my eyes were pink as well. "Great. So much fucking pink." Actually it didn't look half bad. Looking around the room, I saw that there was a pair of pink and white headphones next to the bed I was just lying on. Something compelled me to put them on, so I did.

My stomach growled with hunger. "Well, according to everyone, I've been in a coma for a month." With a bit of embarrassment, I exited the room. 'Wait, since when am I embarrassed about being hungry? It's natural!'

"Psyche! It's good to see you can actually stand. I assumed that since you were in bed for a month, your legs would be weak. Did you need something?" Shinra asked, generally surprised and curious.

"Actually, I'm a bit hungry, and I think Celty was right about the fact that I should _attempt_ to remember." If this was my reality, then I wanted to know my life. I don't exactly know anything about myself. It actually really sucks.

"Alright, Psyche, just wait there." A few minutes later, he came back with a plate of ootoro, one of my favorite.

"Ah, sweet, sweet ootoro. When have you ever been wrong?" Shinra just looked at me funny as I gobbled down the precious ootoro.

"Seems as if you like ootoro, no matter how you perceive yourself." I ignored him as I continued to gobble down more ootoro.

When I finished, I looked up at Celty and Shinra. "So, you guys said I should try to remember. What exactly should I do to do that?"

"Well," Celty replied, not looking uncertain in the least bit "let me take you home. Stay with Tsugaru and have him tell you about yourself. He knows more about you than we do, and you'd be in familiar territory. He also has a lot of pictures of you two you could look at. If you want, I'll take you home now, but Tsugaru may be asleep."

"Yeah, that works. You probably know how to get in anyway."

Celty nodded and I followed her to her motorcycle. Soon, we were on our way to, my home. We rode from their home in Ikebukuro, to my home in Shinjuku. Strange, I lived in the same house as I did in my 'fake reality.' To my surprise, the door was unlocked. Celty merely wished me luck before she drove off.

I entered the dark and silent house, looking for any sign of Tsugaru. I soon found him, asleep, with dried tear marks running down his face. I frowned. It didn't suit him to be crying. He's supposed to strong, isn't he? I found myself laying next to him, and falling asleep, subconsciously scooting closer to him.

…/…LB {Tsugaru's POV}

When I awoke, I found Psyche asleep in my arms, it caused me to smile. 'He may not remember consciously, but subconsciously, he knows he loves me. I gently moved away from Psyche, hissing a bit when he clutched onto my broken arm. Still, I kept my smile as I got him to let go. I then made my way to the kitchen, where I proceeded to, with some difficulty, make pancakes for the two of us. Soon, I heard the door open.

"Pancakes, Shizu-chan?"

I frowned a bit, there he went with the Shizu-chan. I didn't enjoy it when he called me by the name of the guy Shinra said he hated. It makes me feel as if he hates me. "It's Tsugaru, Psyche-chan, and pancakes are one of your favorites.

"Really? What other foods do I like, Shizu-chan?"

Again, with the Shizu-chan, even when I just corrected him. It sent a knife through my heart. Is he even attempting to call me Tsugaru? "You like a lot of baked goods. But your absolute favorite will always be ootoro." I kept a fake smile on my face. I didn't want Psyche to see just how sad I've become just because he calls me that simple name. Shizu-chan. The name of his version of me that he hates. "You also like sweets. Not as much as I like them though."

Psyche didn't say a thing and ate his pancakes in silence. It hurt to see him like this. Psyche was always so talkative, now, it's just silent. After breakfast, I washed the dishes with much difficulty, seeing that I had only one arm to use. Psyche didn't even offer to help, and I didn't want to ask him. So it was a good hour or so before I actually got all the dishes washed. When I just turned around, Psyche stood there with some sort of twisted grin on his face.

"That has to be the funniest thing I've ever seen in my entire life. You can't do anything with just one arm!" He proceeded to laugh. Psyche was laughing at my pain. I just kept my clam, fake smile on.

"I guess that it is difficult to do things, with just one arm. Anyway, Psyche, how come you're here? When I talked with you over at Shinra's, you didn't want anything to do with me."

"Well, since you asked, Celty had practically yelled at me, saying that I should at least try to remember. So, I asked for a ride here, seeing as I didn't know where I lived, fell asleep, and well, you woke up and made breakfast. There isn't much else to it. So, why don't we start with you telling me about you? I apparently love you, so tell me what it is about you that I so much admired. Tell me everything about yourself that I knew before."

Apparently. I really don't like that word. He apparently loves me. I don't like that sentence. I kept that fake smile on as I answered. Maybe, he would remember if I did tell him.

"The first time we met, I saved your life. I was just walking home from Shinra's one night, when I heard some struggling in an alleyway. I couldn't just walk away, so I walked deeper into the alley to see what was going on. There were two men, you, and someone else who was clearly drunk. I think he was a debt collector or something, but he obviously, in his drunken state, mistook you for someone else. Since you wouldn't pay up, he decided that you should forfeit your life. He brandished his knife; however, I pushed you out of the way, and got sliced across the chest instead. The man passed out and I took you home." I rubbed my chest. "It left a scar, and I'll always be glad of it. The scar is proof that I met you, and I wouldn't get rid of it for the world."

Psyche just sat there, looking a bit stunned, as if he didn't believe me. "So, you just randomly save the life of a stranger, even though it could have gotten you killed?"

My heart sank. He doesn't remember. "Yeah. I'm not the type to just sit there while someone needs help. I would have done it even if I knew we would never see each other again." I still kept the smile on my face as Psyche asked me more questions.

"What's your favorite color?"

"Blue."

"Do you always where a kimono?"

"Almost always. It's relaxing."

"What's your family like?"

"I don't have any siblings, or cousins. My parents are wonderful people who decided to support me no matter what I chose to do."

Then, Psyche asked a question I thought he didn't have to ask. "How come you like me so much?"

I just kept my calm, fake smile on as I answered his question. "I like you because you are you. I like you so much because of who you are. I'll like you no matter what happens, and I'll never leave you." I seemed calm, but inside, I was dying. All I want is for Psyche to remember, even if he chooses not to be with me.

***Sniffle sniffle* I almost started crying when I wrote Tsugaru's POV. He's so hurt. I feel like such a bad person now. Poor, poor Tsugaru. Don't worry, Psyche will remember eventually, I hope. It depends on what I type up. I'm thinking that I most likely will have him remember.**

**I still feel horrible for being so mean to Tsugaru.**


	4. Chapter 4

***Sniffle sniffle* I always reread the last chapter before I start typing up the next one. Now I'm all sad because I was mean to Tsugaru. Anyway, I'm thankful that so many of you like this story. I feel really good when my work is appreciated. It makes me feel like I matter. Now, time to type up this chapter.**

**While I'm at it. http:/www(dot)thepetitionsite(dot)com/1/durarara-season-2/ The goal is met, but still, it's more likely to happen with more signatures.**

**Summery and disclaimer are in chapter one.**

**Information: Psyche doesn't remember his life as Psyche, so Tsugaru has to tell him about his life.**

**Warning(s): Tsugaru is sad. D:**

I just continued to ask Tsugaru questions. However, when I asked that _one_ question, I had a horrible feeling that I had asked something I shouldn't have asked. "How come you like me so much?"

Tsugaru's just kept his calm smile on as he answered the question. "I like you because you are you. I like you so much because of who you are. I'll like you no matter what happens, and I'll never leave you." He seemed calm. But the word is seemed. I had the terrible feeling that he wasn't as fine as he came off as.

"Are you alright?" I asked the question with concern in my voice. I knew when people were hiding something, and right now, Tsugaru was hiding something. I could feel it.

"Yeah. Hey, how about I show you your room?" I was hesitant. He obviously avoided my question. However, I ended up nodding and following me. I actually wanted to see what my room looked like.

…/…LB

"Here we are." I just kept that calm smile on as I opened the door to Psyche's room. He looked around, obviously curious.

"White walls, pale pink carpet, plain bed." He stopped when he saw the shelf full of all his stuffed animals. "What the hell are these?" He asked as he picked a stuffed bunny plush. "Stuffed animal? Really? I'm into all this stupid little kid crap?" I just stayed silent as he dropped the rabbit to the ground. I had bought him that last year for his birthday… Psyche just kicked it under the bed, not bothering to pick it up.

I pretended to be completely fine, glad that I was such a good actor. "Is there anything else you want to know? We have about ten minutes to lunch."

"Yeah, tell me exactly what had occurred that made you lose your temper."

That was the last thing I wanted to relive. But, he had asked. So, I just kept that fake smile on as I nodded. "Alright."

_I had just gotten back home from work. I immediately changed from my casual clothes into my kimono. "Psyche, I'm going out."_

"_Noooo! Tsu-chan! You haven't been spending time with me! I want my Tsu-chan!" Psyche was clutching onto my arm, tears starting to well up in his eyes._

"_Come on Psyche, I'll only be gone for a little bit. I'm just going out with Celty. Why don't you practice your singing while I'm gone?" Psyche nodded, tears still welled up in the corners of his eyes._

"_A-alright." I could hear hesitance in his tone, like he was thinking about something deeply._

_After spending about two hours with Celty, I returned home to see a very angry looking Psyche. "What's wrong?" I asked, generally worried._

"_You like her more than me."_

"_No, Psyche. I needed her help with something."_

"_I don't care what you say because you're lying."_

_I blinked. Psyche was being stubborn again. "Psyche, that's not true. I have a question to ask you."_

"_What? Are you going to ask me to move out?"_

_I could feel myself, for once, start to grow irritated. "Will you listen?"_

"_NO! Tsugaru! Why are you always with Celty? It's because you love her, isn't it?"_

_Something in me had snapped. The next thing I knew, my arm was extended as if I had just punched someone, and Psyche had gone through the window, ramming into the building behind ours. I ignored the pain in my arm as I ran to Psyche, who was unconscious with such a look of utter terror on in face. I heaved him onto my back and sprinted towards Shinra's house._

After I explained it, I was silent, just waiting for Psyche to say something. "From what I've heard, and seen, you only care for Celty as a friend. So I know that I must have been jealous. What were you going to ask me?"

I thought about the small box containing a ring I had asked Celty to help me pick out. It wouldn't matter know. "Oh, I don't even remember. I don't think it was all that important."

Psyche just looked at me skeptically. "If you say so. Hey, look! It's lunchtime!" Psyche just easily brushed it off.

"Alright. Let's eat."

…/…LB

"Hey, Celty, how come you were with Tsugaru on that day?"

Celty was a bit hesitant at first. "You have to keep it a secret. I don't think Tsugaru would be very happy if he knew I told you, especially now that Psyche doesn't remember anything."

"Of course I'll keep it a secret. I'll even act as if you never told me."

"I was helping Tsugaru pick out a wedding ring."

Shinra's eyes widened with surprise. "Wow. I didn't expect that. And Psyche practically accused him of going out with you, and now he doesn't remember anything. Tsugaru must feel horrible."

Celty nodded. "Yeah. I wouldn't know what I'd do if something like that happened to me. So, let's do him a favor, and not bring it up. He already has to deal with Psyche not remembering anything, let's not make it any more painful for him."

…/…LB

I secretly eyed this Tsugaru person all throughout lunch. He didn't notice I was, and seemed to be really deep in thought. After lunch, he placed the dishes in the sink and walked into, what I'm assuming was his bedroom. A few minutes later, he walked out, wearing, a bartender's outfit. "I'm going to work. I'll be back sometime around nine."

He looked so calm, but so much like Shizu-chan. I instantly remembered what had last happened. "Alright, whatever. See you then." I didn't notice his look of complete sadness as he left.

Being left alone made me bored. I didn't really want to leave the house, so I wondered around. For whatever reason, I ended up is Tsugaru's room. I was bored and noisy, so I started to go through his things. Everything was neat and tidy. I was just about to leave and explore more of the house when I caught sight of a small box. It was out of place in the tidy room.

Curiosity ended up getting the better of me, and I ended opening the box. My eyes widened at what I saw. A wedding ring. Supposedly for me. That must have been why he was out with Celty. He wanted her help in picking it out. "I feel like such a jerk, and I don't even remember what it is that I did. Tsugaru told me, but it still seems like someone else did that."

I cursed under my breath as I put the box back _exactly_ the way I found it, not wanting Tsugaru to know that I had seen it. Obviously, he must feel horrible about hitting me hard enough to send me into a coma, thus having my memories suppressed for the equivalent of twenty-three years. Yeah, I kind of do accept what Shinra had said. It doesn't mean I have to like it.

I curled up on the couch, starting to feel a bit lonely. Soon, I fell asleep, not noticing that I had muttered a tired, "Tsu-chan."

***Smiley face.* I typed it up, and I'm happy with what I have typed. This is coming along well. I'm trying to slowly merge Izaya and Psyche's personalities. Ooh, I'm going to put a poll up on my profile. Please vote. And review. I like it when you guys review, makes me feel special.**


	5. Chapter 5

**I really don't want to type. To be honest, I' sick and tired of typing and I'm tempted to just curl into a ball and fall asleep before my mom makes me up in an hour and a half. But, I've gotten positive encouragement for this story, and I'm not going to let you guys down! Uggg. Sorry, I started to feel sluggish halfway through typing chapter nine of Nai Wata Shi.**

**Summery and disclaimer are in chapter one.**

**Information: I may fall sleep while typing this. [Okay, I have to go to bed. I'm falling asleep. I'll type the rest when I get up. *has only typed to "Stay, Tsu-chan."]**

**{*Is back*}**

**Warning(s): It starts a big sluggish because I was extremely tired. And Tsugaru hates himself.**

I got home around nine: thirty, only to find Psyche curled up, asleep on the couch. I smiled softly. "You always did have a lot of energy, and you always crashed, even if you didn't use it all." I picked Psyche up, and headed towards his room. I laid Psyche down on the bed and put his earphones on the bedside table. I was about to leave when Psyche grabbed me in his sleep.

"Stay, Tsu-chan."

I smiled. "Let me change first. I really don't like this outfit." He did. After I changed I lay down next to him and wrapped my arms around him. Psyche cuddled into my chest. "I love you, Psyche-chan." I soon feel asleep.

…/…LB

I opened my eyes only to see that I was curled into Tsugaru's chest. I found myself blushing slightly. Ack! Bad Izaya –err- Psyche! I looked at his sleeping face, only to see that he was making a face that showed he was in pain. At that point, I realized that I was clutching onto his broken arm. Instantly, I let go and got out of bed. Seeing as he was still sleeping, I quickly changed clothes, throwing the dirty ones into the hamper. I grabbed my earphones off the bedside table and put them on. I really didn't feel right without wearing them. "Hmmm, what to do, what to do?"

I made my way to the kitchen and started to make some pancakes. Sometime while I was cooking, Tsugaru made his way into the kitchen. "I'll finish cooking if you want." I just waved him off.

"No, no. I already started, and I hate leaving things for other people, well, other than paperwork."

"I'll do dishes then."

"Suit yourself. I don't really care." After that statement, Tsugaru was silent. I had the strange feeling that I hurt his feelings. I scoffed at the thought. Yeah right, he probably just doesn't have anything to say. I served the pancakes and pretty much just dumped the dirty dishes into the sink.

After breakfast, I watched with some amusement as Tsugaru struggled to wash dishes with just one arm. I didn't offer help, and he didn't ask for it. Deep within my soul, I felt as if I had done something wrong. "You said that I called you Tsu-chan. Why is that?"

"You thought that it was a cute little nickname. It also went with your childish nature. You would always call me your Tsu-chan." There was silence until Tsugaru finished washing the dishes. "Do you have any other questions about me or you?"

"No der. I don't know anything. Think with your undeveloped brain for once." The response was automatic, seeing as I was used to teasing Shizu-chan. The creepiest thing is that, he didn't drop his calm smile.

"Alright. What else do you want to know?"

The calm, understanding tone of his voice sent shivers up my spine. He couldn't just be unaffected by statement, could he? "Yeah. What are some of my hobbies?"

The way he just stayed smiling, and talked with a calm voice told me that _something_ was wrong. "Well, you really like to sing and dance. It's your favorite thing to do. You own several DVDs that were designed to help people learn to sing and dance well."

He was just way to calm. It was scaring me. I didn't actually care that I was acting out-of-character. {Or in character, depending on how you looked at it.} I leaned closer to Tsugaru, and grabbed his good hand with mine. "Tsu-chan, something's wrong. Please tell me what it is."

He was silent for a moment before he got up. "Psyche-chan, I have to use the restroom. Please excuse me." As he left, I could have sworn that I saw that he was crying. But, I had to be imagining things, right?

…/…LB

I slumped against the bathroom door, tears falling freely from my face. Why can't Psyche just remember? Why does he have to act like himself at times, and others, act like he hates me? I can't even apologize to him properly if he doesn't remember. I mean, I could still apologize, but it wouldn't mean a thing. I tried to rub the tears away, but they just wouldn't stop.

All this, because just once, just once, I couldn't keep my temper. This is all my fault. I made Psyche so scared of me that he had to go and create a whole new personality. He dislikes me so much, that he made himself hate his version of me. He even went so far as to call his version of me a _monster_. Was I really that horrible?

I stood up and wiped the tears away. It wouldn't do any good to let Psyche see me crying. He would blame himself. But, this wasn't his fault. No, it was _entirely_ my own fault. Psyche has every reason to hate me.

I punched the mirror, wincing as shards of glass imbedded themselves into my flesh. The other shards fell to the ground with a clatter, breaking into even smaller pieces. I sighed as I began to pick up the glass, wincing every time I cut myself on a piece.

"Tsugaru! What the hell is taking you so long?" Ah, right. Psyche was here.

"Sorry. I'll be out in a moment." I hurriedly picked up the rest of the glass, dumping it into the trashcan before I opened the bathroom door, quickly shoving my hand in a pocket in my kimono before he could notice it. I didn't really care that there were still shards of glass imbedded in my skin.

Psyche just looked at me with worried eyes. "You were crying."

"It was nothing important."

"Then tell me."

"No."

"I need to know everything I can about every situation. So tell me."

I could feel my heart sink. He didn't care about what was bugging me. Psyche just wanted to be in control of everything. He wanted to know information, and that was it. "I'll tell you after I take a nap." I yawned, and made my way to my bed. I curled up on the bed, shoving my hand underneath the pillow, wincing as I lay on my hand. I soon fell asleep.

…/…LB

As soon as Tsugaru left for his bedroom, I walked into the bathroom, looking for anything that would have told me why he took so long. My chest ached at the thought of it being my fault that he was sad. The first thing I saw, was the broken mirror, and droplets of blood on the floor. Broken glass was pooled in the trashcan. Did he break the mirror?

I quickly made my way to Tsugaru's room. His hand was stuffed under his pillow. I quickly moved the pillow noting, with disgust, the blood that was sure to stain the white pillow. After a quick inspection of his hand, I found that there were _still_ shards of glass in his hand. Carefully, I took the shards out, throwing them in the trash, before I bandaged up his hand.

"Psyche-chan." I perked up at the mention of my name. However, he was still asleep. So, he was dreaming about me. I don't think it was a happy dream though. He was sadly frowning. "Do you hate me?"

Then it hit me like a trashcan to the side. He thought I hated him. I frowned at the thought. "I don't hate you." I didn't hate him. No. I think that I was actually starting to like him. This would be a problem if Shinra's split personality theory was right. However, I had a feeling that it was wrong. I had a feeling that it _was_ just a case of suppressed memories.

I sighed as I lay down next to Tsugaru. "Quit unintentionally hurting yourself." I snuggled close to Tsugaru, feeling safe. And I decided that I would wait like this, for him to wake up, so he had _something_ to be happy about.

**Awwwe, go Psyche who still acts like Izaya! The poll is also closed now. I know what I'm going to do. Psyche and Izaya's personalities will merge. I'm sure you might be able to see it here.**

**Sorry for not updating after I updated Nai Wata Shi, like I usually do, but I was exhausted. I need sleep, I'm human! I don't need much sleep though. I think that next time; I'll wait until both are typed up before I upload them. Yeah. That works. Please review.**


	6. Chapter 6

**First off, Nai Wata Shi _will_ end soon. However, last night, _literally_ right after I finished typing the chapter, I thought of the summery for the sequel. I have to say, poor, poor Shizuo. Here's the summery.**

"**I'll make a deal with you two. If you continue to torture him, but make sure that he doesn't die, then when he changes back, I'll erase Nai from everyone's memories except for his. I'll turn back time and let Izaya live. What do you say?" Fate and Destiny looked at each other. "Deal, but only because Nai is part of Shizu-Shizu now." And that's exactly what I did.**

**I need help thinking of a title for it. If you have an idea, please tell me, and explain why it should be titled that. I'll give you credit if your title is the one I pick.**

**Anyway, I just got up and I'm ready to type. I really like how this story is going. I don't want to type. So, I'm going to attempt to type this up as fast as I can. *Hates to type but loves writing fanfictions.***

**Summery and disclaimer are in chapter one.**

**Warning(s): Damn, I made Tsugaru depressed. Don't worry; he's not going to cut himself or anything. No, he's going to keep it locked up inside, which, in my experience, is worse. Oh, and I get mean. Poor Tsugaru. Why do I write like this? Oh yeah, I like to see characters in despair, but want them to have happy endings. Makes sense to me.**

**I'm sad right now because I keep reading a fanfiction that makes me cry. I don't even reread all of it. I start at chapter six.**

**http:/www (dot) fanfiction (dot) net/s/6542994/1/Under_The_Surface#**

**Read it, and tell me you didn't get sad. I actually read this two days ago, and couldn't stop crying. Then, last night, halfway through typing Nai Wata Shi, I went to reread it. I was crying so much that I couldn't see the letters on the screen, and had to wait until I stopped before I typed. I'm tearing up now at the thought of it. And I know, I'll reread it tonight.**

**I'm sad because no one has reviewed chapter five. *sniffles* I realize that people don't have to always review, but the same thing happened to my Death Note fics. No one reviewed, and now, even though I want to update, I can't find it in myself to.**

I opened my slowly opened my eyes to see that Psyched was curled into my chest. I smiled, thinking that he was asleep. "You don't have to tell me anymore. I know what's going on." I _nearly_ jumped. Psyche was awake. He sat up and looked at me. "You talked a bit in your sleep. I may not remember, but, Tsugaru, I don't hate you. The reason I act like I do is because that's how I'm used to acting. I'm used to pissing off Shizu-chan just to see the reaction he has when he gets angry. You're not him, no matter what the similarities may be." He inhaled deeply, as if he wasn't used to saying what was next. "I'm sorry."

I was silent for a moment before I wrapped my good arm around Psyche, hugging him. "I forgive you." I rested my head on his shoulder, slightly tempted to kiss it. I didn't.

"Are you crying again?" He asked, worry evident in his tone.

"Yeah. But it's because I'm so happy." It was a lie. I was crying because he apologized for hurting my feelings when he didn't eve know his name when he woke up. But that was my fault. He apologized for something that was my fault. I wanted to apologize, but it wouldn't mean a thing if he didn't remember. Why else would he have said nothing about when I apologized after he woke up? I pulled away from Psyche, wiping my tears away. "Do you want to know anything else today, or would you rather wait until tomorrow so that you can finish properly processing what I've told you so far?"

"I think that I'll wait until tomorrow. I can't really think of anything to ask. What, one question. Would you prefer it if I called you Tsugaru or Tsu-chan? You said I called you the second all the time, and I have a habit for making up nicknames."

I didn't want him to call me Tsu-chan until he remembered. But… "Call me what you want. If you want to continue to call me Tsugaru, it's fine. If you want to call me Tsu-chan, like you used to, it's also fine." I kept up a smile.

"Tsu-chan it is. It seems to fit you more anyway."

I just nodded. "Let's go on a walk."

…/…LB

I had agreed. We were currently walking through the park. I had to say, it was rather peaceful. It seemed too peaceful, but that's probably because I was used to being chased by Shizuo. I was used to the not-normal-normal and not this. It was a little later that we both sat down on one of the park benches to rest. "Why don't you wait here? I'll go get us both some ice cream. I'll be back in around ten minutes or so."

I nodded. "Alright." I was a little hungry, and Tsugaru had said that I liked sweets. Still, that uneasy feeling was back. Tsugaru came back fifteen minutes later, and handed me a chocolate cone. His was held in his other hand, seeing that his arm was in a sling. His hand was still mobile.

"Let's go." I nodded, getting up so that we could finish our walk.

…/…LB

They were there again. Men who had heard of the strength I used once, and wanted me to join their gang. I wanted to ignore them and just get the ice cream however; it seemed as if that wasn't to be.

"Tsugaru, man, come on. Just for a little while. We'll even give you some goods so that you aren't always hurting yourself." The man ushered to my broken arm.

"No thanks. I don't like to fight."

"So, you don't really need your arm for a while, do you?" People were watching. They saw what was going on, yet they didn't move to help. People get attacked all the time. Why would saving one person make a difference? The man grabbed my broken arm, and pulled it out of the sling.

I hissed in pain as he twisted my arm backwards. He kept going, ignoring my pain, until there was an audible snap. Satisfied, the man put my arm back in the sling, making sure that it looked as it did before, before he left. I then walked into the ice scream shop, masking my pain, as I ordered two ice creams. I held mine in my left hand, so that if I had to drop a cone because the pain in my arm was too great, I wouldn't drop Psyche's.

I made my way back to Psyche. The whole ordeal took about fifteen minutes. Psyche had no idea about what had happened. It was better that way.

…/…LB

"Celty, could you pick up Tsugaru, and maybe Psyche as well, I need to check up on Tsugaru's arm."

"Sure. I'll be back in a bit."

Celty was indeed back in a bit, Tsugaru and Psyche in tow. "Psyche, just wait in the other room with Celty. I'm just checking out how Tsugaru's arm is healing."

"Fine." I rolled my eyes. Seems as if Psyche hasn't really remembered anything yet.

I turned to Tsugaru. "You ready?" He nodded. I gently pulled his arm out of the sling, causing him to hiss in pain. "Tsugaru, it didn't hurt last week when I examined your arm. I made sure to be careful."

"It's nothing."

I sighed as I dragged Tsugaru, by his good arm, to the x-ray machine. One scan later… "Your arm is even more broken!"

"Sssssh! Don't let Psyche hear."

I crossed my arms. "Tell me what happened, now." After he finished explaining what had just happened, I replied. "You can't just stand there and take it. Tsugaru, you have to do something to defend yourself. Otherwise, one day, you may end up dead." I was already fixing up Tsugaru's arm.

"Just, don't tell Psyche."

"Fine."

…/…LB

The rest of the day was peaceful. Tsugaru and Psyche spent it at home, and just watched TV. Eventually, Tsugaru went to work, leaving Psyche at home. He got bored, but didn't bother to snoop. Eventually, he fell asleep on the couch. When Tsugaru got home, he changed, and with difficulty, carried Psyche to his room. "Goodnight, Psyche-chan. I love you."

**And I end the chapter with something cheesy. Hurray! Now, to save and upload this.**


	7. Chapter 7

_**IMPORTANT! PLEASE READ!**_

**I'm in K12's online schools. That is why I'm able to type stuff up like I've been doing. I got a laptop for being in it. However, I don't get to see any of my friends because I'm not actually going to a school, and I can't just go over to their houses. It's actually been incredibly difficult on me. I've been thinking of going back to regular public school. If I do, I don't know how long it'll be between updates. I don't have a computer of my own to type on, and my phone doesn't have anything like word to type on. I will still be able to review, favorite, and alert stories, seeing as I have internet access on my phone. I will also be able to reply to reviews, but there will not be updates. It could be well over a year before I update again if I do chose to go back to a public school. I'm a fourteen year old girl, and this just isn't working out for me. I'm sorry to everyone. But also remember, I may not go back to a regular school. Though, at this moment, it is most likely that I will go back.**

**I will also post this in the ending author's note.**

**I'm going to write this chapter completely in Psyche's POV. I'm just typing on a whim, but I do that anyway. So there shouldn't be much of a difference. I am a little tired, despite getting up three hours ago.**

**Disclaimer and summery are in chapter one.**

**Warning(s): Hurray for random other personality! Death! Of the random we-don't-care-about-you-random people. I'm horrible at writing fight scenes. I think I rushed this chapter a bit.**

**Oh, I just thought of something to make this story deeper. Alright. Help me remember STH=surrounded death w/ red eyes and Saika. I'll know what it means. **

After Shinra examined Tsugaru, he came to me, and made sure that Tsugaru couldn't hear what he was saying. "Psyche, I know you don't remember anything, but I'm going to tell you something, even though Tsugaru asked me not to tell you." I nodded in acknowledgment. Shinra then explained to me what had happened to Tsugaru.

"You mean he was attacked?" I questioned, feeling anger starting to boil within me.

"Yes. And the way Tsugaru described it to me, this wasn't the first time."

Celty was right, he _wouldn't_ fight back. No matter what. Well, I couldn't just sit there and let him take it. It didn't fit. "Alright, I'll act as if I don't know anything."

…/…LB

When Tsugaru and I got home from Shinra's, I insisted that he let me cook and do the dishes. It was strange for me to do cook, but I knew how because I used to cook for Mairu and Kururi. He gladly let me, glad that he didn't have to do it one handed. After dinner, we just sat and watched T.V. This whole thing was just too peaceful for me. However, it was relaxing, considering what I had decided what I was going to do after Tsugaru went to sleep.

Eventually, we 'both' went to sleep.

…/…LB

I blinked, getting used to the feel of the contacts. If I was going to do this, I did _not_ want to get caught. Color contacts and a change of outfit was what I had to do. I wasn't an informant, meaning that I didn't have contacts that would gladly cover this up for me. I blinked again, still unused to the feeling of the contacts. Screw getting used to the contacts! I exited the house, making my way to where I knew the gang would be hanging.

Why was I doing this exactly? Simple, something inside of me was compelling me to help Tsugaru. So, getting rid of the ones who were hurting him would definitely be helping.

"Who the hell are you?" This would be one of the gang members.

"My name is Hachimenroppi."

"What the hell do you want?"

I smirked. Oh, this would be so much fun! "You all to die." I didn't give him the chance to reply, seeing as had rammed my elbow into his stomach. Another man charged at me. I dodged and wrenched the knife out of his hand. It wasn't my flickblade, but it would do.

I moved to the side, dodging yet another man. As he stumbled, I grabbed him, slitting the back of his throat, and just left him there to bleed out. This continued on. The en would run at me, I would dodge, either slicing their neck or leaving them alone as another man would charge. It was at moments like this, that I was glad of my parkour moves. Eventually, all the men were lying there, dead, cold, on the ground.

I made my way home, taking the contacts out and throwing them in the middle of the street. I had to shower, and dispose of the clothes I was wearing now. However, when I got home, Tsugaru was standing there.

"You killed them."

I couldn't deny him. The blood was splattered all over my clothes. "I." I was pretty sure he would be angry with me.

"Thank you for helping. Next time, don't kill them."

And I knew something was amiss. There's no way that anyone would just let you get away with murder. Tsugaru just turned to go back to his room, muttering a sleep well to me. Something was definitely wrong, and I was determined to find out.

That morning, after we both woke up, I asked Tsugaru about it. "What was last night about?" He just looked at me funny.

"What do you mean, Psyche? We were both asleep."

"I guess it was a dream." Alright, I know that something isn't right. Something has to be going on. I sensed no trace of lying coming from Tsugaru. He didn't know what I was talking about.

"How do you feel about murderers?" Yes, a seemingly random question.

"I wish that no one would ever murder another human being. Life is sacred." He muttered something else under his breathe, but I couldn't hear it. Something was going on. Could be anything like with those possessed by Saika? A random thought, but I couldn't help but think…

**Alright, I know that it is short, and for that I apologize. However, the next chapter should be extra long. Maybe. I really don't like typing. Tell me what you think is going on. I'll message you if you're right, unless you're an anonymous reviewer. I can't message you. I'm so sorry that this chapter is only one and a half pages in word. As I said, the next chapter will definitely be longer.**

_**IMPORTANT! PLEASE READ!**_

**I'm in K12's online schools. That is why I'm able to type stuff up like I've been doing. I got a laptop for being in it. However, I don't get to see any of my friends because I'm not actually going to a school, and I can't just go over to their houses. It's actually been incredibly difficult on me. I've been thinking of going back to regular public school. If I do, I don't know how long it'll be between updates. I don't have a computer of my own to type on, and my phone doesn't have anything like word to type on. I will still be able to review, favorite, and alert stories, seeing as I have internet access on my phone. I will also be able to reply to reviews, but there will not be updates. It could be well over a year before I update again if I do chose to go back to a public school. I'm a fourteen year old girl, and this just isn't working out for me. I'm sorry to everyone. But also remember, I may not go back to a regular school. Though, at this moment, it is most likely that I will go back.**


	8. Chapter 8

_**IMPORTANT PLEASE READ**_

**I'd like to thank everyone who was supportive of when I noted that I may go back to regular school. I've decided, after a long day of thinking and talking to my mom, that I will not go back to regular school until the beginning of the school year next school year. You see, if I were to go back now, it'd be in the middle of the semester. I really don't want to transfer in the middle of the semester. So, I'll be able to continue updating. I can still talk to my friends over the phone and Facebook. I'm actually shy until I get to know someone, and it'd just be really awkward for me to be a new student when everyone else is already settled in. Lucky all of you. Heh heh.**

**Alright, time for the next chapter of Coma. I hope this will be longer than Nai Wata Shi's chapter. I'm unsure. Let's just see where this will go.**

**Summery and disclaimer are in chapter one.**

**Warning(s): Um, it's like Saika, but much creepier, especially since it's Tsugaru.**

**I really just sort of wanted this to keep going. If I don't add stuff like this, it'll get repetitive to me, and then I'll go on hiatus for who know how long. Beware, Shingen's creepy experiment on poor little kid Tsu!**

**I turned this cute little story about Psyche getting his memories as Psyche back into something creepy and unfitting to what I was writing before. But as I wrote, if I didn't add something, then it would get repetitive to me, and I would go on hiatus for who knows how long.**

**Also! Izaya and Psyche will merge personalities. However, at the moment, it is mostly Izaya, seeing as he remembers nothing. Last chapter he just a little bit psychotic.**

"How do you feel about murderers?" It was a seemingly random question. However, I knew that there was more behind it.

"I wish that no one would ever murder another human being. Life is sacred." It is. However, there's a reason I don't like to fight. Under my breath I muttered, "But it doesn't think so." Psyche looked at me.

"You're acting strange." I could practically see gears turning in his head.

"Are you good with knifes?" The question was blurted out, and I could tell, it only made Psyche more curious as to what was wrong.

"Why?" There, I could hear the suspicion in his voice. He knew that something was up. And I knew that there was no way I'd ever be able to lie.

"No reason." I winced as Psyche grabbed onto my broken arm in order to stop me from leaving.

"It's not 'no reason'. And by denying it, you've made me more curious. I knew something was up before, but now, I'm starting to get really worried."

I sighed as I sat down.

"Shinra's father, Shingen Kishitani." I saw Psyche nod with understanding. It seems as if Shingen didn't change at all in his fake reality. "He's… completely nuts. A lot of people describe him as a mad scientist. Essentially, that's what he is. You know, there's a reason I don't like to fight. There's a reason I flat out refuse to fight. Let's just say that I met Shingen when I was around five years old."

…/…LB

I waited for Tsugaru to say something, anything after that. But he fell completely silent. "Tsugaru?" There wasn't a reply. "Tsu-chan?" I tried, hoping that it would elicit a reaction. There was none. This got me worried. "Tsugaru, what's wrong? You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to. You're still trying to get me to remember." When there wasn't a reply, I got really worried. I had this feeling that just told me to RUN! I ignored it, and placed a hand on Tsugaru's shoulder.

"I'm sorry Psyche."

I blinked. "For what." I was confused. He just sat there; face looking at the ground, rendering me unable to see his expression.

"For hurting you, for sending you into that coma, for making you forget everything. Honestly, I don't see why you even bothered to try and remember. It's obvious that you hate me. Just look how you treated your version of me, your Shizu-chan. Shinra told me you hated him, wanted him dead."

I blinked. Tsugaru kept changing the subject. But, this seemed genuine. I removed my hands from his broken arm. "I don't hate you. If it means anything to you, I didn't actually hate Shizu-chan either. I just loved to irritate him. I didn't actually think I could kill him either, which is why I said I wanted him dead. I'm trying to remember because it's rather pathetic to not know yourself. I'm trying to remember because I do feel something. I may not remember you punching me, but I forgive you." He was silent.

"Thanks."

After that, the day went on as normal. It was strange, and I knew something was wrong. It was too surreal, too calm, but I dared not to ask Tsugaru again. My body just screamed for me to stop whenever I went to. This actually scared me. My body had never been so afraid, not even when Shizu-chan had my knife. Eventually, he went to work. I attempted to stay up for him, but I fell asleep.

…/…LB (Celty's POV)

I sighed as I finished reading the email I had gotten from Shingen. Something strange was going to happen.

_Check up on Tsugaru. He won't be at his house. He should be at the slums. Don't let him see you, and don't approach him. You may very well end up dead if you do. Don't let anyone know of this email or what you may see except for Shinra. He knows of my little experiment. And though he's angry at me for working on his friend, especially since they were only five years old when I did it, he'll keep it a secret. He'll know what to do. This will be your first time checking up on Tsugaru. Usually, I have Shinra do it. However, you need experience. Do not talk about this until after you check up on him. After the experience, go to Shinra. Tell him about it. He'll know if it's normal. And know, I'm still trying to find a cure. I made a mistake._

_~Shingen Kishitani_

That was strange and I knew it. However, it was Shingen. … HE EXPERIMENTED ON TSUGARU! Oh, I was going to kill the man when I saw him… after he found a cure to whatever it is that he did to Tsugaru. "Shinra! I'm going out for a bit!"

"Alright Celty. See you when you get back."

…/…LB (It's only a scene change.)

That… can't possibly be Tsugaru. There's no way that that demon was the calm, gentle man I knew. What on earth did Shingen do? I could feel myself shaking in fear as I watch in horror what was going on. There was… so much death. He wasn't even using any weapons, yet the men bleed as if they were cut. The blood pouring onto the ground, creating a pool of dark, crimson liquid. It dripped from his hand. I couldn't move.

Tsugaru looked strait at me, his eyes glowing a pure red. "Cel…ty…run." He wasn't in control yet he was aware of what was going on. No wonder he didn't fight. I ran.

…/…LB

"WHAT THE HELL DID YOUR FATHER DO TO TSUGARU?"

"Celty, calm down.

"HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO CALM DOWN AFTER WHAT I JUST SAW?"

"Then don't calm down, just sit so that I can explain."

Celty sat down on the couch, obviously wanting to murder my father. "I became friends with Tsugaru when we started kindergarten. He was just so calm, no matter what happened. It was incredible. My father saw that I had a friend, an of course invited him over. I agreed. My father was amazed that literally _nothing_ got him angry. Sure, some things said and done would make him feel sad, or some other emotion, but never angry. So, he got an idea. What would happen if someone who was always level-headed could take out anyone and everyone who dared to be just evil? That day, the only day Tsugaru ever came over to my house, my father invited him the other room for just a moment. I was ignorant as to what was going on, and told Tsugaru that I would wait. A few moments later, I heard several objects breaking. I ran into the room that both Tsugaru and my father were in, only to see Tsugaru with eyes glowing red, my father's blood coating him and my father unconscious, but alive, in the corner. He looked at me, and I noticed tears running down his face. He lunged at me, and I was unable to move. At the last moment, Tsugaru stopped and just collapsed to the ground, crying over and over 'I'm sorry'. Since then, my father has been looking for a way to reverse it. It's like, he put some evil being into Tsugaru's soul. Since then, Tsugaru has refused to fight. He is aware of every moment of every time it takes over. And I swear, I'm going to murder my father as soon as anyone can get Tsugaru back to his old self."

Celty nodded in understanding. "I'm assuming that this doesn't happen very often. I'm also assuming that when you go to murder your dad, that you'll let me tag along."

"Of course, Celty. And this is the first time that it's happened in two years. Most likely triggered by the act of violence he didn't mean to commit."

**Oh yeah, I turned it dark and stuff. Don't worry if you don't want to read all this dark stuff, it will be resolved in one to two chapters. Don't you all hate Shingen now? How could he do that to poor Tsugaru? Well, I wrote it. Now I feel like such a horrible person. But then I feel better, knowing it will be resolved.**

**Please, leave me a review telling me your opinion of what I have written. And it will go back to the sort-of-fluff-angst-getting-Psyche-to-remember-his-memories-of-Psyche-not-so-dark-fic in one or two chapters. I just need to add random things from time to time or else I'll get bored.**

**And I already know the cure. You can vote, trying to figure out which one is the correct one. (By the way, they're cliché)**

**1-A kiss on the lips from Psyche.**

**2-Injected with what ever it was that made him like this again.**

**3-SMEX (Hint hint, this isn't going to happen for awhile.)**

**4-Getting beat to the brink of death.**

**5-All but the first.**

**6-All but the second.**

**7-All but the third.**

**8-All but the fourth.**

**As I said, I already know how he's going to get back to normal, but I'd really like to hear what you think will happen.**


	9. Chapter 9

***Bows head apologetically before blinking.* That is Ooc for me. I normally would be all 'I'm sorry for not updating! I'm updating it now!' I blame the lack of sleep I've been getting. Anyway, I've had a few people ask for an update, one of them in the review of one of my other fics, so I've decided to update. Actually, I was gonna go to bed. I guess people wanna see Tsugaru get back to normal, eh? *Yawn.* I'm very tired. This is unusual. However, I have Shizaya videos playing in the background in a YouTube playlist, so let's hope for the best! Uggg. More typing.**

**Summery and Disclaimer are in chapter one.**

**Warning(s): I'm telling you this now, this chapter is a bit rushed. Mostly because I want to get back to the more light-hearted style of writing. Also because I'm tired and want to sleep. Sorry about it. I just don't know what to do with this otherwise.**

Shingen burst through the door. That was weird, considering that he was supposed to be in America at the moment. "IknowhowtofixTsugaru!" I blinked as I tried to figure out what he was saying. He stopped, taking huge gasps of air for a moment before continuing. "I know how to fix Tsugaru." He cut both me and Shinra off before we could say a thing. "It's completely cliché, but, I know it'll work." He rubbed the back of his head guiltily. "I experimented a bit on a few of my assistants. Heh heh."

I should have felt angry, but the thought of Tsugaru getting back to his normal, peaceful self, it was just an amazing thought. "So, how does he get back to normal?"

"Alright, so whatever it was I used on him is evil. Evil is dark, so naturally, we would need something light. Now, what is the most pure, light thing you can think of?"

It was Shinra who answered. "Love!"

"Correct. Now, naturally, we can't just force Psyche who, if I understand this correctly, doesn't remember anything to make love with Tsugaru. It wouldn't be the same. However, Psyche should still subconsciously feel the same for Tsugaru. What we need Psyche to do, is kiss Tsugaru, fully on the lips. However, we can't just strait out tell him that he has to kiss Tsugaru. I doubt that he even knows what's going on. So, I guess we'll just have to wait until that happens on its own."

"Wait, but hasn't Psyche done that before? Why should it be any different now?"

"Because, before, it was always quick little pecks mostly on Tsugaru's cheek. It has to be fully on the lips, and longer than three seconds."

I was silent for a moment. "Alright, Shingen, for figuring out how to cure whatever it was you did to Tsugaru. You do realize that both Shinra and I area going to kill you, right? We'll give you a one minute head-start." I didn't have to tell him twice. Shingen was fleeing out the door, sprinting towards the airport.

…/…LB

When I awoke that morning, I found that I was still on the couch. That worried me. The past couple of times I fell asleep on the couch, Tsugaru moved me to my bed. I quickly got up and ran to Tsugaru's room. I stopped and stared. Tsugaru was asleep on his bed, still in his work uniform. Said uniform was covered in blood, and the blood was splattered in a way that it could only be had Tsugaru cur the person who the blood belonged to. I would know. I couldn't really move as I stood in the doorway, just staring. A moment, I assumed a memory flashing before my eyes.

"_T-Tsu-Tsu-chan?" I just stood there as I watched Tsugaru stand in the middle of a ring of dead bodies. The key word being dead. Tsugaru, the Tsugaru I knew wouldn't even, he never attacked anyone. He couldn't kill them! Whoever it was turned to look at me._

"_Psyche…chan." He didn't say anything else as he walked towards me. I couldn't move. He… he was covered in blood. It was nauseating. Soon, he was standing in front of me, his hand on my cheek, gently scratching it as if he was looking for the perfect spot to make me bleed. His eyes glowed red. Just as I felt his nail start to dig into my cheek, he stopped, collapsing to the ground. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry." I did what anyone would have done. I ran._

_I ran strait home and locked myself in my room. I could feel eyes prickling the corners of my eyes at just the memory of what I had seen, at what I had witnessed. Soon, there was a knock at my door. "Psyche, let me tell you what happened."_

"_No! You're not Tsu-chan! Tsu-chan would never, he'd never…" I trailed off unable to continue._

"_Just let me explain." I said nothing, so Tsugaru continued. "You see, when I was little, Shingen experimented on me…"_

_After the explanation, I hesitantly unlocked and opened my door. Peeking out, I saw Tsugaru in a clean, not blood covered, kimono. I jumped on Tsugaru, hugging him tightly. "I'll help you, Tsu-chan! Shinra's dad is just a huge meanie! Tsu-chan isn't the monster! Tsu-chan is himself!"_

_Tsugaru smiled, hugging me back as we did our best to forget about what happened. I remember that that was nearly two years ago._

When I snapped out of it, Tsugaru was no longer in his room, and I could smell bacon. 'He must have woken up.' I made my way downstairs just in time to see Tsugaru finish cooking breakfast.

"I'm sorry."

"It's fine. And I remembered something because of it! Granted, it isn't that much, but it's something. And if I wasn't sure that Shinra and Celty were going to murder Shingen, I would murder him myself." Tsugaru smiled softly as he sat down at the table.

"Thanks."

I actually smiled a real, genuine, not-smirk smile. "It's fine." I made my way over until I was standing next to where Tsugaru was sitting and leaned down, kissing him. "I may not remember anything but that one bit, but I can tell that I do love you, Tsugaru." I could tell that Tsugaru was happy.

Somehow, we both knew that whatever it was that Shingen had put into Tsugaru was gone.

**Yeah. Its twenty minutes until six in the morning, and my dad is getting ready for work. I'm about to fall asleep where I'm typing. Cute little fluff at the end. Just for everyone. *Sigh* I'm so tired. Good-night, morning, time of day everyone. Ugg, and my mom is gonna get me up any time from seven to nine.**


	10. Chapter 10

**Alright, I opened up my email and read reviews people had left for me. And then I was like, 'I should update.' Then, I thought about which fic was the one I haven't updated lately. Upon checking, I found that it was Coma. So, guess what fic I'm updating.**

… **No. It's not Nai Wata Shi. Okay, I was just being random. I'm updating Coma! *Grins happily* Alright, at the end of the chapter, I'm going to give you a list of my fics and the summaries, as well as if they're complete or not. K? Alright, update time.**

**Summery and disclaimer are in chapter one.**

**Warning(s): Psyche and Tsugaru and 23 and 24, just like Izaya and Shizuo, meaning that they would have been born in 1988 and 1987. (Meaning that currently, the year is 2011.)**

It's been about two months since the Saika-like incident with Tsugaru. We had gone to Shinra, and he had announced that all traces of whatever it was, was gone. About a month ago, Tsugaru went to Shinra in order to get his cast removed so he currently had full operation of both arms. Tsugaru had continued to tell me things about both him and me. Things about my relationships with other people, even some of the more surprising things that had happened while I was in my coma.

It's still strange to say that. To think that those twenty-three years of my life were completely made up. Much to Tsugaru's disappointment I haven't remembered anything else since the one memory. And that one doesn't have much use anymore.

Though, Tsugaru has said that I've acted like Psyche, I mean, myself at times. Like how I always fall asleep while waiting for him, and how I cuddle things in my sleep. I've even slipped into calling him Tsu-chan when we're talking. I don't even notice doing these things because, well, it felt natural.

Though, back to the current moment. I was bored. Tsugaru was at work. So what was I doing to appease my boredom? I was snooping. Well, I don't think it's really snooping, seeing as I was examining my own room. I sighed, as I crawled under the bed. Really, I must be very bored. The first thing I found under the bed was a stuffed pink bunny. Why would this be here? My mind flashed to when Tsugaru first showed me my room. Right, I had kicked it under the bed, and I guess I never picked it back up. I smiled softly as I looked at the stuffed animal, a memory flashing before my eyes.

_May 4, 2011, 6:02 A.M._

_Tsugaru smiled warmly at me as he held something behind his back. I tiredly rubbed my eyes, glancing at the clock. "Tsu-chan, it's six in the morning. I'm tired." As if to prove my point, I yawned tiredly._

"_Psyche-chan, can you guess what's behind my back?" I just tiredly looked at him before shaking my head no. "It's a present."_

_My eyes widened with surprise. "A present!" I had a huge grin on my face. However, that grin soon turned to one of deep thought. "Why are you giving me a present?"_

_Tsugaru laughed, ruffling my hair a bit with one of his hands, holding the gift behind his back with the other. "Because it's your birthday, silly."_

_I grinned and laughed. "How'd I forget?" I was tempted to glomp Tsugaru, but that might damage the gift._

"_You forgot because it's so early in the morning. Now, close your eyes and hold your hands out in front of you."_

_I smiled, sitting on the bed Indian style as I closed my eyes and held my hands out in front of me. For once I didn't try to peek, seeing as I knew Tsugaru would catch me if I tried. I felt something soft being placed into my hands. I opened my eyes to find myself staring at a pink stuffed rabbit. "I bought it especially for you."_

_I smiled, gently placing the rabbit next to me before glomping Tsugaru. "Thank you, Tsu-chan! I love it!"_

I found myself starring at the rabbit, still under the bed. "And I had called it a stupid little kid thing, kicked it under the bed, and forgot about it." Instantly, my mind thought about Tsugaru, and how I could tell he was hiding something when I first woke up. Did I hurt his feelings? Probably. I climbed out from under the bed, and placed the rabbit on my bed next to the pillows.

Satisfied, I went back to snooping around my own room. I pushed away the clothes hanging in my closet, looking for something to entertain me. There was a box on the shelf, hidden behind many of my clothes. I got curious. It was covered in dust, meaning that Tsugaru didn't know it was here. I plucked the box off the shelf and sat down on the ground with it. After a very slight moment's hesitation, I opened the box, only to find a small journal. After another moment's hesitation, I opened the journal to the first page, reading it.

June 8th, 2006

Dear Journal-san,

Today, I had a man save me from another man who was trying to kill me. I didn't do anything wrong but Mr. Stranger was drunk, and thought that I was someone else. Anyway, the man who saved me is called Tsugaru Heiwajima. I feel a bit, I don't know, guilty? Tsugaru-san pushed me out of the way of a knife, resulting in him getting cut. Psyche doesn't want Tsugaru-san to get hurt because of me.

I don't know him, well; I do now, but still. Psyche is upset a stranger got hurt because he was a nice man! Tsugaru-san even walked me home, so that I wouldn't get hurt anymore. Psyche wants to pay Tsugaru-san back! Maybe Psyche can get him a small gift for saving me. Then again, I may not see him again.

Psyche should just be careful! Psyche doesn't wanna make anyone sad by getting hurt! Hmmm. Maybe I can make friends with Tsugaru-san. He seems nice. But I don't wanna just go out looking for him. That'd be creepy. And Psyche doesn't wanna be creepy! Creepy people are bad! Psyche isn't bad!

I wanna know, Journal-san, do you actually listen to Psyche? I don't think it matters; Psyche has this journal so I can write down what I think. Well, Journal-san, I have to go to bed. Night-night!

I blinked as a reread the entry. So, I had a journal. This may help me remember, or at least, understand my life. It also seems like I'm childish, and serious at the same time in this entry. How strange. I sighed as I placed the journal back into the box, and place the box back in the back of the closet.

"I'll read one entry everyday until I read them all. Then, I'll start writing in it. Though, there's only the one journal, and its first entry is dated five years ago. I guess that I only wrote down important things. I sighed again as I crawled into my bed. It was dark out, and I could feel my eyelids drooping. I'd see Tsugaru in the morning. I curled up under the covers, cuddling the stuffed rabbit, as I drifted off to dream land.

**Sorry for not updating. I hate typing and I have several other on-going fics. So, please tell me what you think.**

**Now, for my fics I said I would post. *Sigh* I'm shamefully promoting myself.**

**the what if switch. [Bleach, on-going, hiatus.] **Rukia kurosaki was just a normal teenager until Ichigo Kuchiki cane into her life... what would happen if Ichigo and Rukia's spots were switched. some things have obviously changed from the anime.

**Evil's Life. [Death Note, on-going, hiatus.] **When Light gets into a car accident, he loses the ability to use and the memories of the Death Note. a few hours after being hit, the killings double. Makes L suspicious. What will happen and whats with the black aura Light sees around everyone?

**He's not Gone. [Death Note, on-going, hiatus.] **"You have to accept the facts, L, he's dead. Light will not come home to you." L merely shook his head in defiance. "Watari, I would know if Light as dead. I would feel it. I feel nothing of the sort telling me of Light-kun being dead. Therefore, he is

**I Will Possess Your Heart. [Death Note, complete, songfic.] **You gotta spend some time, God, you gotta spend some time with me. And I know that you'll find love. I will possess your heart.

**Life of a Death. [Death Note, on-going, hiatus.] **Shingami are gods of they go they bring death and destruction. So what happens when two gods of death break the biggest rule, and create life? the penalty? they forget about their child, their love for each other and... Full summary inside.

**Ode to Light. [Death Note, complete.] **And as I lay there, i realized all too late my mistakes. I closed my eyes for the final time, and went to MU nothingness .

**Possess. [Death Note, on-going hiatus.] **"You are not Light-kun." "You are half correct. I'm Ryuk, but this is Light Yagami's body." AU

**SemiLiving Shinigami. [Death Note, on-going, hiatus.] **At the age of 4, both parents ad his 2 year old sister were murdered. Ratio was then taken in by the Shinigami rebel, Ryuuku. Still familiar with his father's ideals, he helps the police whenever he can.

**The Korosu Killer. [Death Note, complete.] **L, did you know that I am not real? L pondered aloud, "How does something that does not exist, kill?"

**Collapsed. [Durarara! on-going.] **It started with just a few rumors. 'Shizuo Heiwajima isn't as invincible as we thought.' A few days after that, he collapsed in class. He wasn't seen for three days. When he returned, his arm was in a sling. No matter what happened after that, Shizuo...

**Coma. [Durarara! on-going.] **This is it. Shizuo actually got me. I can see the white and, I'm in Shinra's office? Shizuo is here, apologizing to me. Shinra says I've been in a coma for about a month. They keep calling me Psyche and apparently, everything I remember was the made up

**Given UnInjury. [Durarara! compete.] **One-sided Shizaya. Complete. How could Izaya stand having all those objects thrown at him and not feel a thing? He wasn't immune to pain. Someone had to experience the pain that Izaya should have been feeling. This person was a certain Shizuo Heiwajima.

**In His Head. [Durarara! on-going.] **"Please? Please? Please? Please?" "Fine! What the hell do you want me to do, Shinra?" "Get to know Shizuo better." "Like hell that's ever going to happen. Shizu-chan hates my guts." "But you'll be able to, with this!" Shinra pulled out... Shizaya later.

**Kanashi. [Durarara! complete, songfic.] **Complete songfic. Shizaya. You're so kind to others that I can't help but want you to care more about yourself. Do you have enough heart left in you for yourself?

**Monster. [Durarara! complete.] **One, simply cannot live without the other. To get my life to work, I need Shizu-chan. I'll always be alone, no matter what. Step-dad and the flea are right, I'm just a monster. Character Death.

**Nai Wata Shi [Durarara! on-going.] **"Izaya, you're not allowed to be dead. I was the one supposed to kill you. Open your eyes. Call me a monster, insult me, anything!" "It's too late. That soul has already departed. But, you can give something to revive him." "I'll give anything."

**Never Tears. [Durarara! complete.] **"Stupid, stupid Shizu-chan, just choose to take the tears, so we can live on together." The grave just stayed silent as I went through another lifetime without Shizuo.

**Yaoi Mountain. [Durarara! complete.] **Candy Mountain parody, Yaoi Mountain, featuring Erika, Izaya, Shizuo, and Walker. Prepare yourself for Oocness and mentions of Shizaya. One-shot. Crackfic.

**Yeah. Sorry. Shamefully advertising my fics. Heh-heh. I'm pathetic. Anyway. I'm going to save and upload this now. I hope you enjoyed this update.**

**Also, anyone notice a pattern with my Death Note fics? All the on-going ones are on hiatus. This is because I have writer's block for them all.**


	11. Chapter 11

**Alright, I wish to apologize for not updating my fanfics in awhile. I'm sorry. Anyway, I'm still typing up that original story in hopes that I can get it published, but information about that is in the ending author's not of I Realized That. However, I'm a bit stuck with that, and haven't updated, so, I'm updating. I will also type up and upload the next chapter of Collapsed after that. Again, I'm sorry for not updating. (I'm actually a bit upset that only one person has reviewed my one-shot as of right now.) So, I'm dedicating this chapter to JaMisa27, for being the only one to review that fic, as of right now.**

**Summery and disclaimer are in chapter one.**

**Warning(s): Be prepared, I'm adding Delic in this fic. (Yep. *Nods to self.*)**

I came home with a smile on his face. It was a good day at work. There wasn't anyone too noisy, yet it wasn't painfully quite. Ya, it was a good day. When I opened the door to our house, I saw that Psyche wasn't asleep on the couch. "He must have had enough energy to actually make his way to his bed." I was tempted to go in and see him, but, it was late. So, I made my way to my room, changed into some night clothes [they were really just a t-shirt and shorts], before I crawled into my bed and went to sleep.

…/…LB

I glared at my clock when I got up. 6:30 in the morning. I should be used to getting up early because of my job as an information broker… No. Bad me! I sighed. Really? It's been about two months since I've woken up from my coma, and I still get things confused at times. I continued to glare at the clock. 'It has to be because I'm not fully awake.' I nodded to myself as I sat up and yawned. "Let's see. Read another journal entry now, risk having Tsugaru coming in, or, read it at night, risk having Tsugaru wake up and see it." I ended up grabbing the journal and opening it up to the next entry. "Seems as if curiosity wins…"

August 23rd, 2007

Really? More than a year since the last entry?

Dear Journal-san,

Psyche is so sorry for not writing! Don't be mad, Journal-san! But Psyche wants Journal-san to be for important events. Psyche can't just write in Journal-san everyday. Anyway, guess what, Journal-san!

That's right! Journal-san is so smart! Psyche saw that man again. The one that saved me over a year ago. But, I'm not so sure he recognized me. It's okay! Psyche talked to him. Actually, can Journal-san keep a secret?

Really? Hurray! Thank you, Journal-san. Psyche went on a date with Tsugaru-san. I think that Tsugaru-san actually /did/ remember saving Psyche that day. Psyche knows I remember.

Tsugaru-san looks kinda like that one singer. Uh, I think Delic was his name. When I asked Tsugaru-san about it, he said that Delic was his uncle. But Tsugaru is the same age as Delic, so I don't know.

Aaah! Journal-san! Could… could Tsugaru-san be lying to me? But Tsugaru-san seems like such a nice person. He even bought me ice cream and let me have as many toppings as I wanted. Psyche doesn't want to like someone who lies!

What do I do, Journal-san? What does Psyche do? Psyche wants to be with Tsugaru-san. He's so nice, and he doesn't get mad at me when I start singing, or asked him to dance when we checked out the music store.

Psyche doesn't know. Maybe, maybe Tsugaru-san is testing Psyche. Yeah! Tsugaru-san is telling a little story. He wants to see if Psyche will be good and not be mean to him if he lies, or is related to the singer. Well, Psyche just has to pass the test! I won't bring up Delic, or how someone who is the same age as you shouldn't be your uncle. Psyche will win this, Journal-san!

Well, Journal-san, Psyche has to go. I'm gonna help my mom pick out a present for my dad, cause his birthday is soon. Bye-bye!

Hmmm? Delic. Delic. I don't think Tsugaru has said anything about someone named Delic. I haven't heard of him either. Maybe I should watch more new. But I just find it so boring now! I don't wanna watch something that doesn't interest me. I wanna watch something cute.

…

Okay, I am becoming… myself. And that is still strange to say. You know what? Who cares if I become like myself or not? I'm just going to walk into Tsugaru's room and ask him who Delic is. Or I could knock on his door and wait for him to answer, which seems like the smarter option

…/…LB

There was a knock at my door. "Just a moment Psyche." I quickly finished getting on my kimono as I opened my bedroom door. "Did you want to ask me something?"

Psyche just nodded. "I remembered the name Delic, and something about him being your age and you uncle. Could you please tell me about him?"

"Sure. But first, let's have some breakfast." I knew it was only a matter of time until he asked me about Delic; he's one of Psyche's favorite singers.

…/…LB

"Delic is a singer, as well as my uncle."

"But, I thought he was the same age as you. How does that make sense?" I could see the confusion on Psyche's expression. You know, for him thinking he was an information broker before; he really didn't get much information.

"Well, you know how there can be as many as twenty or more years between siblings born? Well, actually…" I trailed off, it was a bit… I don't know. "I was born out of wedlock. Both my parents were seventeen, and, only a few hours after I was born, Delic was born. It's kind of weird, but, not impossible."

"Ah. So you have a famous relative. Who else know?"

I rolled my eyes. So nosy. "No one else knows. No one who does know has told anyone, except for how I just told you."

"Ah. Hey, Tsu-chan, why don't we just go for a walk? It'd be peaceful, and I can't stand just staying inside all day."

"I don't see why not."

**Alright. I'm very sorry about the short chapter, however, it's because I'd like your input about the next chapter. And, it'll be a poll about Delic, which will be on my profile. I'd appreciate it if you would review, and thanks for reading.**


	12. Chapter 12

**Alright, now that In His Head is finished, I'm updating Coma. Yeah, I don't have much to say in this author's note except, ya. I finished another fanfic. Let's work on finishing this one.**

**Summery and disclaimer are in chapter one.**

**Warning(s): **

I smiled happily as I walked next to Psyche. It was a nice day out. There were no clouds in the sky. There was even a gentle breeze. Today was definetly a nice spring day. Glancing over at Psyche, I realized that he had a slight smile on his face. He probably didn't even realize it. The walk was peaceful. No one came up to bother us. During some point in our walk, Psyche's hand slipped into mine. I would say that it was peaceful. The walk lasted about twenty minutes or so, but the whole thing was nice. It was just us.

I didn't even care that not one word was spoken. It was a nice, gentle silence. I guess you could say that it was something that we both needed. Just to be with each other with out stress or questions. Just to be with each other in a calm environment. It's definitely nice. Perhaps, perhaps being in calm situations like this will help Psyche remember sooner.

We walked for about a half hour, just around the city. However, when we got home, I noticed that there was a car parked in front of our house. "Psyche, it looks like today is your lucky day."

"How come?" I smiled softly. "Because, it looks like Delic came over. He's one of your favorite singers." "Oh." Psyche smiled happily. Probably because meeting someone that is his idol should help him remember some stuff. Maybe he'll remember more of the music he likes to sing. Not much but, everything helps.

The moment we entered the house, we were both embraced in a 'bone-crushing' hug. "Yo. It's so nice to see ya again. This Psyche?"

"Yes. Delic, please let us go." "Huh? Oh, yeah. I suppose I should." I sighed as I brushed out my kimono. I noticed that Psyche looked from Delic, to me, to Delic, to himself, and back to Delic with a look of confusion.

"Why do you guys look almost exactly the same and why are his and my outfits really similar?" Delic blinked twice before laughing. "Ah. Me and Tsugaru look alike because we're family. And I guess our outfits are similar because you're a fan. Tsu has told me that you're a fan, right?"

Psyche furrowed his eyebrows. I guess he was a little creeped out by the similarity of their outfits. "I'm not sure. Tsugaru said I was." Delic laughed. "What'cha do? Lose your memory?"

I guess what followed would be classified as an awkward silence. Delic… sometimes it would be best to get some info before blurting things out.

**Guys, I'm really sorry for the short chapter. I have a bit of a writer's block. Give me ideas to use. Also, how do you guys like my Delic? And as soon as I get some ideas, I'll type up the next chapter. *Sigh* Talk about long wait with bad results.**


	13. Chapter 13

***Wants to throw laptop out of the window* I HATE YOU LAPTOP! *doesn't throw out window* *sobs* I had two paragraphs typed, and they're gone. GONE! WWWHHHYYY? It's gonna take even longer to type now. And no, I'm not being over dramatic. Anyway, typing now.**

**Summery and disclaimer in chapter one.**

"…He did, didn't he? Lose his memory, I mean."

"…Yeah. So, Delic, I would appreciate it if you were…" Tsugaru sighed, unable to put into words what he was trying to say.

"It's fine. I should think before I speak yada yada yada. I know I know. Hey, to make it up to ya, why don't I take Psyche here out around town while you stay here and relax?"

"I don't really think that that's-"

"Alright, come on Psyche." And before either Tsugaru or Psyche had any idea about what was going on, Delic had dragged Psyche out the door and to his car.

* * *

><p>Psyche was uncomfortable in the car with Delic. While he had gotten used to Tsugaru after waking up, he wasn't comfortable with the fact that Delic also looked like Shizuo, as well as Tsugaru, and that their outfits were so similar. It was creepy. Or at least, creepy to him. Psyche thought about it. He guessed that that was somewhat a good thing. As Izaya, he wouldn't really be disturbed by it, and anyone sharing Shizuo's face would immediately have been put on his 'not people but monsters' list alongside Shizuo.<p>

Well, whoever this Delic was, he couldn't be that bad. Really. He was related to Tsugaru, who cares for him so much. Besides, he's a star. Some sort of singer. And certainly, he couldn't be a fan of anyone who was that bad could he?

"So, Psyche, is there anywhere you want to go?"

"Huh? Uh, no. I had no where in mind. Honestly, I thought I was going to spend the day with Tsu-chan. I have no where in mind."

"In that case…why don't we have a bit of fun?"

Psyche blinked twice unsure about what to think. "I'm fine. If we're not going anywhere, why don't we just go back home?"

Delic laughed. "Silly Psyche, why would we do that? We're young and in control. We can go out. Have some fun."

Psyche just shook his head. "Really, Delic, I'm fine. I have Tsu-chan. And as much as I believe that you're a good guy, I don't feel anything for you. Heck I don't even remember what your music sounds like. I didn't even know I was a fan until Tsugaru told me!"

Delic sighed. "That so? Well, seeing as you're with Tsugaru, I can't really hit on you. I don't wanna make Tsugaru angry, even though I could take him. Well, why don't we just cruise around, see the sites? Maybe that'll help you with your little memory problem."

"Alright, I guess that could work." Psyche was a bit wary, especially since Delic said that he would hit on him. That wasn't something that he really wanted to hear. 'I guess he's kinda like Masaomi, though, instead of hitting on girls, he hits on anyone.' Psyche briefly wondered if Delic had better pick-up lines than the kid, but quickly shook the thought out of his head. He had to focus on getting his memory back, not that so-real-but-wasn't reality he thought was his life.

Indeed, they did just cruise around. Though, Psyche didn't really pay attention to the surroundings. He was paying attention to his own thoughts more. Comparing and contrasting things from the two realities. Wondering if he'd ever truly be Psyche, or if the two personalities would merge. Just things.

Vaguely, for a moment, Psyche thought of something concerning Delic. In his fake reality, Izaya (himself) and Shizuo were part of each other's lives. It was true that they weren't lovers, but they were closely intertwined. Now that he's back in reality, he (Psyche) has Tsugaru. Psyche and Tsugaru, who look like Shizuo and Izaya. Then there's Delic, who looks like Shizuo and Tsugaru. So, is there an Izaya/Psyche for him?

Psyche didn't ask for fear of being rude, which he supposed was also a good thing. Izaya wouldn't have cared about being rude. He would have his information. So, he's closer to himself than he was before, and that is always a good thing. Then again, it might not be such a good thing. Either way, Psyche was glad he was closer to getting his memory than he was before.

Soon, it started getting late, and Delic dropped Psyche back off at his home. Something Psyche couldn't help but notice was that Tsugaru looked at Delic, as if he excepted him to do something. Something he wasn't supposed to do, like kiss Psyche. Not that he did, but it seemed as if Tsugaru excepted him to.

"I'll be around for a few days. Gonna rest up at the hotel. See ya later guys." And Delic hopped back into his car, and drove away.

**Word count says the chapter, not author's note is 785 words. That's longer than last time. Definitely. I'm happy. My flow for this story is coming back. I guess that I just needed a break.**

**Anyway, since Delic is in this fic, should I go ahead and put Hibiya in it as well? Did you guys like this chapter. Are you guys gonna have to wait an overly long time for the next update? Who knows?**

**Also, I uploaded chapter one of the sequel to Nai Wata Shi. It's called Tsujo Means Normal. So, if you liked Nai Wata Shi, look out for that. (I'm unsure if it's up anywhere but the emails of people who have me author alerted, but I'm saying this anyway.)**


	14. Chapter 14

**Well, I have nothing better to do. *pushes newly purchased manga behind her* So I'm typing up the next chapter of Coma for you guys. Also, Tsugaru on the Durarara rp site (Prustrian Informant) keeps telling me to update, of she won't update any of her fics****, so…updating.**

**Also, guys, if you read, please take the time to review. The reviews help give me inspiration. Three reviews last chapter, even if they're positive, doesn't exactly make me want to type.**

**Summery and disclaimer are in chapter one.**

Tsu-chan is asleep again. That's good. Now I can go read the next page of the diary.

October 5th, 2007

Huh, a little over a month. I wonder what happened that was so important. Wait, that's why I'm reading this, duh.

Journal-san, Journal-san, or would you prefer to be called Journal-chan? Anyway, Psyche is very happy! Psyche is very happy! Guess why!

*giggle* No, Journal-san is wrong. No, Journal-san is wrong again. Does Journal-san want me to tell you what happened that made Psyche so happy? Okay!

Tsugaru-chan got Psyche a present! And not just any present! A special present. Journal-san, guess what Tsugaru-chan got Psyche! Please? Come on, Journal-san! *giggle* Nope. Journal-san is wrong again.

Tsugaru-chan got me a signed CD by Delic! Delic! I'm so happy! So very happy! When I asked Tsugaru-chan what it was for, he replied:

"Well, we met over a year ago, so this is for one birthday that I missed getting you anything." And so, I took the CD, and I saw that it was one that hasn't been released yet. "How'd you get this? It isn't out yet?" Tsugaru smiled at me. "I already told you, Delic is my uncle. It was easy to get this."

See, Journal-san? Tsugaru-chan is the best! Better than the best! Psyche got something that just finished being made, and signed! Psyche is happy, so very happy!

A-ah. Journal-san is mad, aren't you? I told you that you're for important events, and here I am writing in you after getting a present. B-but Psyche didn't want to forget this. It's important to Psyche!

S-so, don't be mad at me to Journal-san, please? Y-you're not mad? Yay! Thank you, Journal-san! I'd be so sad if Journal-san was mad at me. *Yawn* Well, Psyche is tired. Psyche is going to take a nap. I'll talk with Journal-san next time something important or something that I don't want to forget happens.

Bye-bye, Journal-san.

Huh? So getting a new CD was something that I didn't want to forget. Hmm. I wonder if I was easily pleased. Maybe I used to be easily pleased by people I cared about. I don't really know.

Do I still have that CD? Wait, stupid question. Tsugaru says I'm a fan, and the CD was a present, and I wrote that I didn't want to forget that. Let's not forget to say that the CD was signed by who is supposed to be my favorite singer. Why would I ever get rid of it?

I'm not so sure if I'm happy that I had to think a moment about that or not. Huh. I guess that I'll find out how I'll act when I get back all my memories when I get back all my memories. The world is funny that way.

I yawned. It was late. I should probably be getting to sleep. Psyche-me isn't as used to staying up late as me-Izaya was. Why do I still do that? I am Psyche, not Izaya. That's not that hard to remember. Me=Psyche. Izaya=not me.

I yawned again. Must be mistaking things because it's late. Okay, bed-time.

**Sorry for the short chapter, but at least I updated faster than I usually do! Also, Prustrian Informant, you can no longer go on strike! I updated, so you must!**

**People, please, review. It inspires me to type more.**


	15. Chapter 15

**Everyone, this chapter is dedicated to **Prustrian Informant**. You here that, Tsugaru? I'm gonna try to make you a fluffy TsuPsy chapter. I never actually try to make a chapter a certain genre. But I shall try to make a fluffy little chapter for you.**

**Summery and disclaimer are in chapter one.**

"Psyche. You need to get up now, Psyche." Psyche groaned and rolled over, causing Tsugaru to smile. "Psyche, get up."

"Tsu-chan~ it's too early. I wanna sleep." This only caused Tsugaru to chuckle.

"Psyche-chan, get up. I have the whole day planned out."

Psyche groaned again before sitting up. "Tsu, it's too early."

Tsugaru smiled, finding that the way that Psyche tiredly rubbed his eyes was cute. "But Psyche-chan, I have the whole day planned out. We were gonna have breakfast then spend the remainder of the day at an amusement park."

Psyche yawned. "Tsugaru, I don't want to go to an amusement park. They're boring." Tsugaru laughed and ruffled Psyche's hair.

"Psyche-chan, you may think that, but you've always loved amusement parks. We'll even ride the Ferris wheel before we leave."

"Fine. But only because I apparently love amusement parks, and because you made me get up so early. Not used to it."

* * *

><p>Psyche looked around the amusement park, not amused by the place. "Tsu, I don't like it here."<p>

Tsugaru just sighed. "That's because we haven't done anything yet. Let's go on a few rides, play a few games, then we'll see how you feel."

"…Fine."

The first ride that they two of them went on was a roller coaster, Tsugaru's choice. Psyche fidgeted a bit as they got onto the ride. "Tsu?"  
>"Yeah, Psyche?"<p>

"I don't really like roller coasters. Can we not ride this?"

"I'd say yes, but, the ride's already started."

Psyche fidgeted a bit, but said nothing more until the roller coaster reached the top of the first hill. At that point, Psyche grabbed onto Tsugaru's arm, and didn't let go. Psyche didn't let go of Tsugaru's arm until the ride was over. He had obviously not enjoyed it.

"I want to leave." Tsugaru sighed.

"We'll leave after we ride the Ferris wheel."

"…Fine."

Tsugaru and Psyche headed towards the Ferris wheel. Surprisingly, the line wasn't that long. Tsugaru smiled as they got into one of the Ferris wheel carts. They climbed higher and higher.

"Psyche, it'd be much prettier if it were night."

"I don't care. It's nice up here. We can see everyone. And we're so high up. It's amazing!"

Tsugaru chuckled. Psyche was still Psyche, even if he was a little of this 'Izaya'. Tsugaru pulled Psyche into a hug. "Psyche."

"Yeah, Tsu?"

"I love you. I really do, no matter who you think you are or how you act."

Tsugaru leaned forward so that he could kiss Psyche, and Psyche let him.

**OTL I fail. I just fail. I'm sorry. I cannot write fluff to save my life unless my writing naturally leads into it. OTL and this chapter is short. Really short. Plus it holds nothing towards the plot. It is filler (fail) fluff for the Tsugaru on the Durarara role-play site I'm apart of. I hope you enjoyed. **


	16. Chapter 16

**Okay people! This is the last chapter of Coma! I know exactly how I'm going to end it. I just can't keep typing up a memory loss fic. My ideas, they won't come. And they're going to a fic that I haven't even posted yet that I have the first two chapters written. *sobs* So many ideas! Yeah. Anyway, I even have the author's note of those two chapters written, so you'll get to see how long it took me to finish this, Tsujo Means Normal, and Caged Animal. After I finish those, I'll be uploading the fic I've written some of. Anyway, typing.**

**Summery and disclaimer are in chapter one.**

Psyche let Tsugaru kiss him. He didn't know why. He didn't remember his feelings for the man. However, he did feel like he belonged with this man. As if they were half and half. One could not exist with out the other. And that was all he needed.

No more skeptic, 'but Shizu-chan is a monster and I can't be with someone who shares his face and voice!' Shizuo Heiwajima did not exist. Neither did Mairu or Kururi. Kasuka had been replaced with Delic, and as an uncle, not brother. Izaya, who he thought he was…not real.

None of it mattered. What mattered was the here and now. He was here, now, with his Tsu-chan. His Tsugaru. Someone who loved him for who he was. No matter how he acted. No matter whom he thought he was. Tsugaru would love him forever and ever.

Psyche could feel happiness whelm inside of him. He was accepted. He wasn't hated. He was loved. And even if it wasn't all humans, like he wanted, he was okay. He knows that he'll never be God either. He was in a coma and his life before was all a lie. Strangely, he was okay with that. Psyche didn't want immortality either. Now that he's grown re-attached to Tsugaru, he didn't think he could bare the thought of outliving Tsugaru.

Tsugaru smiled as he pulled away from the kiss. "Let's go home, Psyche…right after we get back to the ground." Psyche grinned and nodded.

As the two walked home, Psyche thought about something. Should he really finish reading that diary? Memories were one thing, but he could always make more. Memories of the past would do nothing for him now. They were over and done with. As long as he lived, there would be new memories. And memories they last forever. Psyche didn't know what or how he'd act when he'd finished with the diary. Would he love Tsugaru the same as he did now? Maybe, maybe not.

Psyche didn't want to take the chance that he'd love Tsugaru any differently than he did now. Sure, after reading the diary, he might love him more, but there was a chance. Psyche didn't want to take a chance with this. It was something that he didn't want to risk losing. Ever. Sure, he'd still have to get used to this life. At times, he still thought himself as Izaya, but that was fine.

And sure, he wouldn't like the exact same things he did before, but that was alright. The stuffed animals and all the cute stuff would have to be regulated. The pink and white outfit he wore could stay. Psyche rather liked how it fit. He was still a bit creeped out about the similarity of his and Delic's outfits, but he'd grow used to it. Just like how he had grown used to the idea that his whole life had been some coma-induced lie.

Soon, the two of them reached their home. Psyche smiled a bit as they entered the house. Calm and peaceful. With Tsugaru. Everything was good. Everything was alright.

"I'm gonna make lunch now, alright?"

"Of course it's alright, Tsu-chan."

Psyche had fallen into the habit of calling Tsugaru, Tsu-chan. As Tsugaru made lunch, Psyche wandered up to Tsugaru's room. There was something he wanted to grab. Something that Tsugaru hadn't shown him yet, and most likely thought that he couldn't give to Psyche until Psyche got his memories back.

"Tough luck, Tsu-chan, I know about it. And I'm gonna give it to you, Tsu," he whispered to himself.

It only took a moment for Psyche to locate the ring. Tsugaru hadn't moved it from the spot it had previously been located. He grinned as he stuffed the ring box into his pocket. Psyche's plan was to give it to Tsugaru after lunch.

"Psyche! Lunch is done!"

Perfect. "Coming Tsu-chan!"

The two ate in silence. They didn't have much to say. Both were happy that the other loved and accepted. It wasn't until Tsugaru got up to do the dishes, did Psyche speak up.

"Tsu-chan, could you close your eyes and hold out your hands?"

"Hmm? Of course." Psyche smiled happily as Tsugaru closed his eyes and held out his hands. Silently, Psyche pulled the ring box out of his pocket and gently placed it into Tsugaru's hands.

"Open it."

Tsugaru did. "Psyche, this is-."

"I love you Tsugaru. And I accept. You got it for me, right?"

Tsugaru smiled. "Yeah. I love you Psyche." It was silent for a moment. "Let's get married."

**End! I'm ending it! You guys like? (Oh crap, I completely forgot to put Hibiya in. OTL) Anyway, should I update Caged Animal or Tsujo Means Normal next? (Probably Caged Animal. Heh-heh.)**


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